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Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Dining Tips a la Monzyummylunch!

The editors, writing on behalf of the Monz, take this opportunity (presented by the Monz-admittedly lackluster lunch of a footlong turkey sandwich from "the place") to present some important and timely dining tips. You may have read about the Chicago attorney (not Monz!) who left a $3 tip on a $200 bill and subsequently found himself outed by a bitter waitress. The attorney claims he made a mistake by misplacing the decimal on the credit card slip. Leaving aside that $20 would still be a smll tip, we offer the following advice:

1) Don't pay by credit card -- this way they won't have your name!
2) If you make reservations, use an alias of someone you don't like, like "Ernie Attorney."
3) If the service is horrible, don't retaliate with a small tip! Respond by expanding their universe, like Monz and editors! You'd be surprised at the sources of tip-size mind expanding printed materials out there. We kinda liked epistomology for deep dark nights of the, er, soul. Then again, sometimes a picture is worth 1,000 words!
Comments:
Here's a tip: there's no future in being a waitress!  
coffe?tea?or me?  
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