monzyummylunch

Wig Snap Jack!


Monz, spared from Chicago's deep freeze but not of Chicago's work ethic, keeps to his am barbequing for pm lunching, adding some hummus to the apple/banana regimine to keep us on our toes. Meanwhile, the EIC was getting a haircut and as his favorite stylist is a fan of "24" just like Monz, we asked for some insight. "His hair!" she said. The EIC must have looked perplexed, for she continued "they tell him to clean himself up -- his haircut is perfect!" Hmmmmmmmm.

What's Old Is New!

The Media Editor (ME) has noticed something odd of late: two-three year old tv and radio ads that haven't been seen or heard from in a while are being brought back. Take the Olive Garden resturaunt ("endless and bottomless!" - Monz) spot where a woman gives a waitress a description of her "date," who at the end is revealed to be her darling little boy. Or the LaSalle Bank radio spot where a man who applied for a home loan 12 years ago from a competitor bank gets a call requesting more information. We're not sure if this is planned nostalgia or if the businesses are just too cheap to buy new ads.

We face the same conundrum when considering Monz' lunch: BBQ chicken (left over from last week) on wheat bread and an apple. We think it's the planned yumminess, which is why we didn't title this post "Old Is the New New!"

Honesty Is Such a Simple Word!

Monz calls in from sunny FL, editors type during a 24 commercial!

"At the Charlotte NC airport I had a thai chicken pizza chicken from California Pizza kitchen. When I say that I mean I ate half, then I got scared of airport food."

Beach Baby, Save Your Life!

Today we have two big topics. First, Monz' Friday lunch! Monz continues to rave about Quonset Pizza of Waukegan. We're not kidding, he's almost at the point of encouraging pilgramiges for the true pizza believer. This last time was sausage.

Monz was way ahead of those other Chicagoans with Flordia plans -- he had his trip booked long ago! While Monz is in the sun, we were listening to a local sportstalk station who asked a sports psychologist what he would do to help the Bears eratic QB Rex Grossman. He responded that he would make Rex visualize his most successful games in the past and not show him the bad games. But, the hosts asked, how could he then learn from his mistakes? Easy: write the mistakes on paper, just don't visualize them. The psych said there's some research out there demonstrating the power of the visualization thing. He referenced EMDR, which seems to be something a little different, but hey: Go Bears! Go You!

Annie Yummy Lunch!

Tomorrow tomorrow I'll lunch ya tomorrow you were always a lunch away...

Kerrrack!

Our crack investigators have done it again! Pictured above are two Office Max(tm) rubberband balls that were being handed out last year in downtown Chicago. These pictures reveal a giant fraud! Look at the ball on the left. It's a colorfull collage of yellow, red and orange. Now look at the one at the right. After the top layer of rubber bands are peeled off, the ball consists of nothing but orange rubber bands!

Monz' lunch matches the news. Monz goes for takeout from Huitzuquena. A Pollo Burrito [pollo = chicken - Food Editor]. No sour cream but a sweet lunch: Monz swears it is one of (if not *the) yummiest burritos he's ever eaten.

Would We Lie to You?!

People have a hard time bearing bad news. Take Sherwyn's, a beloved (by some) health food store in Lincoln Park. They posted a "closed for remodeling" sign in their window. It wasn't true! Months later a sad sign replaced it. "They're gone. They didn't move. They aren't reopening." DiOlio's, a not all that beloved hot dog/Italian Beef stand on with mostly friendly people working there put up a similar sign, which would yellow with age until workers started ripping up the joint.

We know some of you are concerned with the late posts and diminished size of 2007's MYL. But we're not closed for remodeling, we're just slowed for job readjustment. Things will pick up, we promise. Like Monz' lunch: Ham and Turkey sub from the aged master Tony, with olive salad positively drenched on top.

Stoic Strength!

In these days of uncertainty and fear both home and abroad, the nation -- nay! -- the world turns its lonely eyes to a leader to show them the way: Monz. For it was just this past Friday that Monz's American-made vehicle was callously struck by a speeding Future Guest Worker (last seen being taken away in a squad car by Waukegan's finest). Well, it takes more than several tons of high speed metal impact to stop the Monz! He was back at work yesterday and back to making lunch today! Barbequed chicken on a 5 inch French roll, with apple.

Unwell Well!

The MYL crack investigative team has uncovered another way those insidious salesmen are out to take your hard earned money. It's by the utterly false use of pregnant pauses or the word "well" followed by a repetition of what was just said to convey genuinity. For example, Miller Lite has a radio ad where a man says "if you're chosing a light beer, why not chose one that tastes like...beer?" Progressive insurance has a man saying "every day Progressive does something that's, well, progressive." Don't believe them - they're reading a script!

After all, if you're going to have a yummy but inexpensive lunch, why not have one that tastes like...lunch? Like the Monday special from The Place, supersized, with Baked Lays as the item of choice.

What Do Dick Clark, Donnie Osmond, and Big Brother Have In Common?!

The Pyramid, of course! The picture you find above represents what the government thinks the Monz should eat. Monz thinks for himself, but does he consume unhealthy guzzables out of spite? No way! Barbequed chicken breast on 5" french roll and a gala apple.

Clark McDerment!

MYL readers know when the world goes crazy and Blogger (tm) goes down (in prime time no less), the editors go to Clark McDerment for a hard hitting, no nonsense, but literate report. Take it away CM!

A crushing workload contributed to Monz' fatigue. While Monz managed to make it to the office and put in a productive day's work, hard choices had to be made, and thus there was no morning bbq of chicken. Instead, Monz revived Chinese Food Friday a day early. Because a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of a small mind, Monz returned to Fong's for spicy shredded pork and small chicken fried rice, said chicken foreshadowing lunches to come.

Trick or Treat!

The editors were at McDonald's debating whether to use their "wake up with the one you love -- but which is right for you?" quiz on the paper that covered their trays for a fun MYL poll. It's breakfast, but Monz is all about transcendence, etc. etc. As the debate raged one of the editors grabbed their sheet and noticed that on the back was McDonald's nutritional information (informing him that his lunch had 880 calories, less the mayo, which he asked be left off). A new debate ensued! Was McDonald's to be praised for being so proactive with giving out the infor? Or should they be condemned for hiding it in a place 99% of customers would never look or think to look? The editors could not decide that question, but did determine that based on McD's descriptions Monz is an Egg McMuffin while the Music Editor is clearly a Bacon, Egg and Cheese Biscuit.

While all this was going on, Monz was returning home after a furious day of lawyering in Downtown Chicago. BBQ chicken breast on french roll, apple, and a heel of a french loaf spread with sssssssspicy peanut butter. And we bet all that still had less than those 880's!

Hold the Line, Lunch Isn't Always on Time!

Toto has nothing on the Monz, as he's on the line right now, munificiently telling us that, despite his yummy lunch on the run (racing back from McHenry county court and a committee meeting, grabing some roasted pork with mashed potatos and gravy and icky green beans, small chili and a caffeine free diet coke from the CSC), Monz wants us to blog the lunch of MYL diner CC. CC's non-munificient bosses made her and her comrades work through lunch. They ordered some Edwardos (mediocre Chicago pizza chain) but the peppers tasted weird.

Moneymoneymoneymoney...Money!

Reliable sources have informed the editors that a certain New York Billionaire has consulted the Monz on why his reality based tv show is tanking in the ratings. We waited until long past Monz checks to blog to share with you Monz' confidential report (b/c we know Monz would want you, dear reader, to know!) Names have been changed to protect anonyminousness.

Dear Daniel, the answer is simple. It's none of the things you suggested. People aren't sick of the concept. They aren't sick of you. It's not that this year's age-discrimination-achieved batch of young hotties aren't hot enough. And they damn aren't sympathetic to Roslyn O'Donald. You fool -- it's lunch! Think back to your debut show: you had your wannabe apprentices serve lunchtime lemonade. In subsequent years they served up everything from Burger King(tm) to Dominos(tm) to coney island dogs. Now it's one thing to sell out to a brand name corporation, but selling out Lunch is another thing. Remember the Frusion (tm) breakfast promo? And this season there's not a lunch in sight! I assure you, have the teams sell yumminess like barbequed chicken breast on an extra yummy french roll with differing bakers and throw in an apple and nobody is going to be watching 24 season premieres instead of your show. Well, almost nobody!

Snoring at Wheel!

Privet! It I, Vlad, Ruskie Janitor Engineer at MYL office. I find editor he sleeping at computerski! But study I English and paper -- see Monz ate bird he hunt and roasted in bread baked by French slaves!

I read this paper about reopened Ruskie bath (no at top but at not top). Monz should go! Vlad take Monz! What you think?

Should Monz Take Russian Bath?
	Da!
	Nyet!
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Smart Like Monz!

At first we thought this study showing a link between hunger and intelligence was hooey (first seen in the NY Times, linked here as the NYT doesn't offer free universal access to their archives). But then we asked Monz and without any knowledge of this study and without any need for high-falooting studies of his own, he offered the same opinion! All we know is we pity the fool who is Monz' opposing counsel for whatever he worked on this morning, because Monz had a footlong turkey and ham on whole wheat from The Place, with a newbie worker who didn't skimp on (but alas did not pile on) the peppers.

"Monz To The Blog, Stat!"

Since the editors are clearly too busy to blog my lunch, I am stepping in to fill in. Today I am having Chicken which I barbequed myself (outside, in January . . . thanks giant pollution spewing corporations, third-world countries, superpowers, and SUV driving morons!) on a 5" french bread roll, and an apple.

BTW, if you enjoy telling creationists and global warming deniers where to to shove it as much as I do, you may be interested in this. I know I'm sporting one myself! Now go have lunch.

Getting It Right!

Monz stays true and breaks free: bbq chicken on a five inch fresh French roll, apple, string cheese, and some yummy extra which we wrote down but forgot to bring home (Monz will forgive us).

We, however, will not be so charitable with the Chicago Tribune reporter who wrote this. As we've noted before, the workers at the Cajun Grill at Union Station do not yell "right here!" after "yummy-yum!" (Monz might, but the workers don't!) Nor are they "enthusiastic" -- they look like grown up former child workers who were taught to shout in an enthusiastic style. This story is also dated: during our most recent visit they shouted at the FE (as he walked past to Robinson Ribs) "yummy-yummy-yum!". Worst of all, it misses the point, a point that Monz amply makes every day: it's not the number of times or the loudness of volume that one invokes the venerated word, it's about the food!

Lauryn Hill Yummy Lunch!

"Sure Editors, you can put off blogging to be a bunch of bedwetting nin...er, human rights activists in the far west suburbs" said the Monz (actually he was much kinder, more munificient, and subtle, realizing the uniquely traumatizing experience of the FE this weekend). We wanted to repay this gesture with a review of west burb legend Papa Saverio's Pizza. But instead of finding "a beehive of professionals whipping up culinary delights" we found some high schoolers laconically serving up some fairly standard 'za (plus we didn't get our allegedly free can of pop, though if we were spoiling for a fight we could have brought it up...). Tell us who Monz has to be to get some reciprocity?

BBQ chicken on whole wheat and an apple!

Work It Baby!

Dittolunch. Don't dis the ditto!

Today the EIC, along with the Fashion Editor (FE II), had a unique (thusfar in his middle age life) experience: a photo shoot with a prominent downtown Chicago photographer to get a head shot for his new law firm's web page (yes, the EIC moonlights). Not having followed the "recommendations" (do you really have to wear glasses? if so, can you pop out the lenses? blue shirts better than white, etc.) Mr. Photogopher had to earn his surely hefty fee, having the EIC at least change shirts, powdering the nose and face (with translucent powder) to take off the shine, and then...pose! For one as modest as the EIC, this was no small ordeal, as was the process of looking at 15 honking big pictures of himself on a computer sceen and going through a process of elimination to find the final shot. A strangely enjoyable yet discomforting experience. So dear readers, remember to be like the Monz and, on this day, the EIC this weekend and...Smile!

Bye Bye Baby!

Ditto lunch.

Today the Food Editor (FE) noticed that the Baby Back, a north Chicago suburban eatery which served up far better ribs than you'd expect from the 1st generation European couple that apparently owned and ran the place, has closed. FE never had the pleasure of dining with the Monz there. The FE's fading memory only recalls dining with the Monz at the Wildfire or somesuch fast-food rib joint and the ribs were awful...and at Chicago's famed Leon's Ribs, back when they had a Lincoln Park location. Yummy, in a sweet way, but more memorable for the mind boggling notion of Monz doing a rib road trip!

We Can Explain!

What does a weary editorial staff do when they come home from work after 8:00 PM and have no ideas on how to blog Monz' lunch of grilled piece of chicken on a yummy french bread bun he bought last night at Dominick's (with a honeycrisp apple)? We give him something we know he'll enjoy looking at. And go to bed. Zzz.

Expert Witness!

If you were to visit the MYL offices on Wacker Drive in Chicago, chances are you'd see a queue of taxis waiting to whisk busy workers about town. Many taxi drivers are creatures of habit, thus sometimes you see the same cab drivers waiting in line. Such was the case Friday when the Movie Editor (ME) left work a little early to go see the flick "Children of Men" (ME is a big fan of dystopian fiction). As "luck" would have it, he recognized his driver from a previous fare, and that said driver was a HUGE movie buff. Alas, he recognized that his driver is somewhat talkative and inquisitive too late, as he already had struck up a conversation. Had ME seen this? Had ME seen that? What are you seeing? Oh, Julianne Moore [blahblahblahblahblahbabble]. If only Monz had been there! Monz has seen these flicks, and could dispense with unpretentious yet cogently piercing advice the way James Brown could dispense "HUH!"'s. Of course, the driver got so into it that he abandoned his professional driving ways for some form of soccer mom driving style and the ME was late and had to sit in the second row and get a cramped neck ("Neck!" - Music Editor). And the flick? Well, let's just say it didn't suck.

You could say that Monz' lunch today was kind of a secret, as Monz used this year's Secret Admirer Christmas present (a Subway gift card, which Monz' sleuthing determined was purchased a mile (and several "Subways") away from the MYL office) to try something unusual from The Place: footlong turkey and ham on wheat, made by the good kid with the generous hot peppers.

All is Quiet on New Year's Day!

Monz here. Today Mrs. Monz and I went to Stir Crazy for a delicious custom stir-fry concoction. I had chicken and rice noodles with baby corns, peppers, water chestnuts, etc, with a sauce mixture consisting of spicy basil, peanut, Thai curry and szechwan. It was an intuitive mix, but worked out wonderfully. BTW, the mall this restaurant is in was virtually deserted. It was great!